She's Not Herneschase... shes a very naughty girl

My son, JT has just brought me a lovely glass of grape juice.
"Oh, when did you buy this?" I asked "I thought we'd run out of juice"
"I didn't buy it, I made it" he said beaming from ear to ear.
He had squeezed each grape individually with a garlic crush!
What more could a woman ask for

Now it may not be her birthday yet in the Mother Country, nor indeed is it her birthday in her adopted country but it is her birthday in Kiwiland so this is her virtual birthday present with my love xxx

I virtually bought you a present
You’re virtually getting quite old
I wrapped it and tied it with ribbon
And wrote on your name, big and bold.

I chose you a comical card
Then pondered on what I should write
I Sucked on my pen for an hour or so
Then jotted “Enjoy it La Spice ”

I feel like I’ve know you for ever
But really, it’s not for that long
So we’ll all raise a glass for your birthday
And sing you the usual song

Happy Birthday hugs xxx

I have a new hobby … tree-napping It all started when I discovered that pittosporum bushes were the equivalent of £11.50 in the shops, I decided to dig up all the self-seeded ones around our fence-line and give them all a new home in all the places that our soil is bare and eroding. Just think of the money I will save (unless it is illegal in which case I will be fined heavily and have to serve a prison sentence!)

Today the obsession began to spiral out of hand. I trolled up and down the road for at least an hour and returned with three Kowhai trees and two baby Black Pine. I will email you all from jail and request a cake and a file should things get out of hand.

So, New Year’s Day wasn’t as bad as I had anticipated. The families Mr Not had invited seemed to get on well. The family with children who were terrified of animals seemed to cope with the fact that two other families had brought extra dogs which increased the dog population to 4.

I spent all afternoon promoting our German Shepherd as the most soppy, friendly, nurturing pooch in the world only to have her scrap with a guest’s 10 year old Labrador over a bowl of Hill’s Science dog food! (of course this was greeted with “told-you-so” faces from the family who dislike dogs!)

The other guest’s Fox Terrier, who normally never leaves it’s owners lap, decided it might be fun to mix it up a bit with our cats. The cats promptly left home and the most timid one, Magpie, decided to stay out for 24 hours just to teach us a lesson (causing great weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth from the children who spent most of the day shouting for her at the top of their voices!)

… and finally. Whilst tree-napping, cat-hunting and generally marching about the place trying to look effective (oh yes and shearing the self-shedding Wiltshire sheep who refuse to self-shed and were about to over-heat) I discovered a minor miracle.

Amongst all the dusty mud, a small spring had erupted on the edge of the road near our fence. Not an uncommon occurrence in a country with hot springs and volcanoes but this one was completely cold and ever so slightly puny-looking! I called Mr Not, we had a brief discussion about the possibility of my having had a religious experience on the scale of weeping statues of the Blessed Virgin and whether the Pope had an email address. I shouted Hallelujah a couple of times and then we discovered that the previous owner had laid our trough piping along the side of the road and it was now leaking quite forcibly! A great start to 2008 ..anyone know an emergency plumber?